Monday, May 21, 2012

Feeding America

Well it feels like I'm feeding America sometimes with certain neighbor kids. SERIOUSLY!!

Before I continue on with this story, let's back it up a bit. I started a new job today, one that I've worked extremely hard for. I sacrificed time away from my husband and kids, worked countless hours to prove that I EARNED this title. So, I headed out the door today, excited for my new opportunity and pretty much killed the day. I owned it, and survived it. Needless to say, with my sleepless night before thinking about how said day would go..I am a little exhausted.

After a few bumps on the way home, and I mean figuratively not literally ~ I made it to the driveway. No sooner to realize there are kids bikes in my parking spot, the ONE parking spot in our 3 car garage that is reserved for Mrs. Jekl.

Kimberli = Mrs. Jekl

Irritated a little, exhaustion related? Sure. Moving on. Walk in the house to find Jayden and his friend salivating at the mouth and without a single 'Welcome home Mom!' I get bombarded with 'Can we have something to eat? Can have a drink? Can we have a snack? How many snacks can WE have? Huh huh huh!!'


Yes, you can each have ONE snack. Of course, unlike episodes of Leave it to Beaver where the Mrs. Cleaver happily whips up a batch of homemade chocolate chip cookies to serve all the boys, mine are store bought. Just as filling and 4x the cost. Out skips little said friend with two bags of chips in her hand. 

'Ms. Kimberli...may I have TWO bags of cookies??'


'NO! You can have ONE bag of cookies!'

Then another knock at the door, another little 'friend' coming to join the feeding frenzy. Because if one has a cookie, they all have to have effin cookies. 

To repay me for my kind donations, they take my precious 2.5 year old baby and proceed to torture him on the trampoline. While one is bouncing him up to the high heavens, the other is keeping watch and the third waits until he falls ~ then jumps on him. After three times yelling at Jayden, I run outside in my shoe-less, nylon covered feet, pants half unbuttoned as I had been attempting to get in my comfy clothes. 

I point to the trampoline, 

'Girls, time to go HOME!' 

'Jayden to your room!'


I mean are all kids like that? Do YOU feed the neighbor kids? I told Jayden if he ever walked into someones house and asked for food, he'd better ask for an ambulance too, because he'd get a whoopin! It's expensive enough feeding MY kids, let alone half the neighborhood! 

(Ok, two kids obviously don't make up HALF the neighborhood..but I'm upset so work with me.)

Then to top it off, I got the pleasure of picking up all the little shits darlings cookie wrappers in my backyard.


You would think when we walk around the yard with our Star Wars masks on, other parents would be afraid to let their kids come over. Guess we'll have to think of a new plan. 

**This post was composed entirely under the influence of cold Smirnoff Ice and drowning myself in chips and salsa**

Monday, May 7, 2012

Mommy Moments

In a world filled with fights, boogers, yelling, no privacy, potty training - butt wiping, cleaning, laundry, bathing, cleaning, dog poop scooping, teeth brushing, fart smelling,'mom look at my poop!, more yelling, picking up messes, folding more clothes, cooking dinner, doing dishes, scheduling nanny, school, sports, work, work, work...
There are moments...tiny, little itsy bitsy moments where the heavens open, angels sing praise and I finally realize there ARE reasons that God gave me these two little creatures boys to call me Mom. 

Like when Jayden is doing his best to break his latest record on XBOX and I just can't leave his face alone. I want to smell it, kiss it, whisper in his ear and love him NON STOP. 

Or, when I'm drinking my morning coffee and Casey can't sit in his own chair. He has to climb into my lap and play count the eggs on Sesame Street game. I get to kiss those squishy cheeks and snuggle him in my lap and just live in his absolute, all mine sweetness. 

Now, let the madness continue while we wait for the next itsy bitsy moments to get them to their next birthdays.

Tuesday, May 1, 2012


Chicago was beautiful! We had such a great time, although it was freezing cold and of course in the 80's at home. When we landed, I was surprised at how small the terminals were in O'Hare. For some reason I thought they would be a lot bigger than SLC.

We headed into the city on a shuttle, which is really a van with extra seats jammed in and a cage in the back with luggage. Complete with Evil Kenevil in the driver seat.

Laurie and I had the privilege of being jammed into the very back of a FULL shuttle. I'm not usually a claustrophobic person but that seemed to do the trick. Instead of focusing on a imminent death, I chose to focus on the traffic and the endless supply of skyscrapers. 

We stayed at a beautiful hotel, right on the shore of Lake Michigan, which by the way looks more like an ocean than lake.  

I really only had Monday to play since we flew in on Sunday afternoon and headed out Tuesday afternoon. I made the most of my day! I slept in, had room service coffee and bagel, even watched the Today show! I know that sounds not very exciting, but I used to love watching that show when I stayed home. Now, I'm usually busy getting ready to run out the door. 

I put on my nice jeans, blazer and a pair of nude heels and headed to the concierge. My friend Melissa told me that the best shopping was on the Magnificent Mile, I thought I could catch a cab being as I was so stylish in my heels. When I asked the woman at the desk, 'What is the quickest way to the magnificent mile?' She gave me the most curious look and said 'Well, you could WALK, it's jyst around the corner.' Oh! Right, I'll get right on that Ü 

She was right, it was just around the corner. The LONG two blocks then across a bridge over the Chicago River. 

The city was so beautiful and clean! I was amazed at all the buildings and architecture everywhere. They had boat tours to take you through the city. I didn't take one, I headed to the Mile. 

Mile after Magnificent Mile!! Stores, shops, was AMAZING.  I headed to the shoppes at North Point. I really didn't know I was ON the mile.

I kept thinking there would be signs or something to tell me where exactly I was. I walked into this three story shopping mall and was stopped by a man with a horrible french accent at a skin moisturizer kiosk. You know, the ones I normally fly past. But today, I didn't have a plan or schedule so I thought, what the hell?? He rubbed lotion on my hand and kept asking me the funniest questions in his horrible accent. He said, what is your name my sweet?

I said Kim. For the rest of the time, he called me Kimmie! Kimmie! Which, apparently is how they pronounce Kim in France. He asked me, you use eye cream? I of course said, No. I felt like saying, eye cream! I'm 31 years old and still focusing on my damn acne let alone eye cream! When he heard my response he claimed, 'Bull-Sheet!' again in his accent. I was trying extremely hard not to laugh.

We spent the next 10 minutes going over creams, and I watched as he put a 'botox in a bottle' liquid on my face. My right side of my face began to transform, I literally watched the wrinkles disappear from my cheek. I was amazed! Slightly concerned, as it did look like my face was having a stroke.

How much for this amazing botox in a bottle...$650!! I said 'I cannot afford $650! But thanks for the sample!' My french friend offered me a one time price of $200. Yep, still can't afford it. So I headed on my way. I loved all the different shops, and had a great time exploring the city. I found some way cute deals.

Half way through the day, my feet started to kill. I thought, I could sit down and give them a rest but then I was terrified if I took my shoes off I wouldn't get them back on to go back to the hotel. So, I headed back.

The pain was increasing and by the time I made it back to the bridge I was thinking to myself, what the hell were you doing?! Wearing heels to walk and shop in! Freakin idiot! I just knew my feet were bleeding. If feet could talk, this is what they were yelling at me with every step. 'You stupid girl! You are NOT a professional! You can't pull off these heels in Chicago!! Go home and put on your baby tennis shoes, freakin SISSY! We're bleeding...we're bleeding!'I finally got back to our room and this is just one of the blisters I found....

Appetizing picture? Your Welcome!

I soaked my feet and put on my trusty flip flops and headed back out to adventure more of the city. Here are some of the sights.
                       (the above picture is me getting a much earned pedicure Tuesday before we flew out!)

This is getting ready to cross the river, that big row of buildings all the way down is Magnificent Mile. Incredible!

Tribune right across from NBC studios
Chicago River

 I actually don't know the people under Marilyn's dress, but there was never a time when there weren't strangers getting a picture. I was alone so I didn't dare give my camera to someone, so here is your picture of Marilyn and some random tourists.  

 I believe the tallest one in the background is the Sears Tower. I took this from my cell in the amazing shuttle ride from the airport.

We had a fun, quick trip and had many laughs along the way. It was good to spend time with Laurie. Even though she was in conferences most the day, we had fun dinners and walked through Navy Pier. I even made Laurie go in one of those photo booths, which she hated and it made me laugh. I of course think she's beautiful but naturally, she doesn't see what everyone else does.

 I would love to take Cory back there, it is a very romantic city with a lot of fun places to eat and tours to take. A great time, filled with shopping, laughs, beautiful sights and some much needed giggle fests with my sister, Love you Laurie ♥

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