Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Just Deal with It

As we're all sitting around the table having dinner tonight, we're having our usual discussion....

How was your day?

Even though 9 times out of 10, we all answer the same

Cory 'It was a long day'
Me 'It was good'
Jayden 'Good.'

Then we all discuss what we had for lunch. This tradition started 5.5 years ago when I was staying home with Jayden. Starved for Adult attention, when Cory would walk in the door I would literally attack him and tell him

'Tell me EVERY detail about your day, who did you talk too, what were they wearing and where did you go for lunch.'

I don't know why that intrigued me, but apparently knowing where he went and what he had to eat fulfilled my daily withdrawals for the outside world. As the years went by, it's always been a question I ask Cory everyday. Anyway, I digress.

Along with the normal convo, Jayden adds...

'Someone was mean to me today.'

Excuse me? I can feel my Momma Bear instincts starting to ignite inside me. A small, warm feeling that I do my best to keep under control until I hear what is going on.

I ask Jayden what happened.

'Well....' As he's flipping his hand around absent mindlessly like a 30 year old female gossiping with girlfriends. 'Jake was being mean and pushed me down the slide. We're supposed to wait until the person in front of us gets to the bottom, but he didn't Mom! I hurt the person in front of me and it wasn't my fault!'

'Then, I tried to be nice and let him in the middle of the line with me instead of the back of the line but NO, he pushed me down instead.'

Jayden never offers up a lot of information about Kindergarten, I decide to tread carefully into my response. If I just dismiss it as kids being kids, maybe he won't tell me things like that anymore. If I take it too strong, he'll back off and think he's in trouble. Again, the edition of Parenting for Idiots would be greatly appreciated here!

'Well, what do you do when someone's being mean Jayden?'

'Well.' He sighs and leans his head in his hand and appears to be in deep thought about his response as well. 'I can't tell the teacher, because tattle telling isn't very nice. Um, I guess I'll just deal with it Mom.'

I'm not sure how sometimes when I'm talking to a 5 year old it can feel as though I'm talking to a 20 year old ~ But with Jayden, it often does.

'I don't think you have to just deal with it Jayden, but you're right. Tattling isn't good all the time either. Daddy, what do you think?'

As I look to my husband, he's giving me a look and after 6 years of marriage, I can read his mind completely. He's can ask me what I think, but I doubt you'll like what I have to say.

Kick his ass Jade!

So, moving on from Daddy's thoughts before he gives him that advice. I did not want Jayden to have an excuse to have a fight at school.

'Alright, how about if someone is mean to you, ask them to stop. If they don't, then go tell Mrs. Brewer. That way you can give them a chance to stop before you go and get help.'

'Ok Mom.'

Simple as that, it was over.

One of the reasons I love having dinner together at the table every night, is that no matter how many nights of the same conversations that we've had a thousand times before or when we don't feel like talking and we sit in silence, sometimes we even yell to stop yelling at each other. But every now and then, our children remember dinner time is a time to talk. Mom and Dad will always listen and always be there for them. I want our kitchen table to be a safe place where they can tell us about whats going on in their life.

If you can't feel safe and loved at home, where can you?

Friday, September 23, 2011

Hat of a Different Color

One of the many lessons I've learned as a Mother is the many, many hats we wear. The interesting part is all through my youth as I pictured what my life would be like when 'I grew up' a constant part of that day dream was my family.
Who would I marry? 
What would my kids look like and how many would I have? 

As I evolved through my life, the questions would evolve with me. I remember while I was pregnant with Jayden, I asked myself...

'How will I know what to do?'

Lesson one - You just know and then you DO

How can a person physically continue to function when going for days and nights in a row with no sleep? How is it that my body was the sole source of food for my child when I could barely remember to feed myself? The months and years are is it that the smell of a strangers throw up is enough to make me succumb to dry heaving ~ but I can clean up with my own hands, my children's nausea, the most foul smelling diapers, boogers, slobber, urine, blood and sweat without qualm? I don't really ever remember my mother being sick when I was young. I now know why. Even when I'm sick, I still just do what needs to be done and know what my kids need and give it to them. Just like my mother did.

Lesson two - You wear the HAT.

You need me to be a doctor? Ok, what is your illness I will either recall a friend whose child has had it or know where to look to find the answer. You need a coach? I'll stand on the sidelines in the pouring rain screaming with all my heart that you can GO GO GO! You need a chief? After many nights of being creative in the kitchen, I can whip up your favorite dish and if not I'll spend the better part of the evening convincing you why it's the best meal you've ever eaten until you're licking the plate clean. You need a maid? I'll clean your room, laundry, bathroom, fold, iron, and organize until the wee hours of the morning. 

Where is my hat rack? I have several to hang. 

I am a Mother. 

Today, this Mother volunteered at the Elementary school for a Kindergarten class. What an eye opening experience. 22 kids in a class. 22 5 yr old's wanting, running, sweating, snotting, crying, pushing, screaming all together in one un-harmonious group. It was my job to help with the computers. The each have a 10 digit long user name and separate 10 digit long password. It was difficult to get these kids to line up let alone log onto a computer. 

User names were like JR8545FRE

Not even really words to help the kids. It was like the user name person had turrets syndrome and was just spurting out letters and numbers. So, lesson one went out the window..I had no idea how to help these other children learn these user names. One little girl kept looking on the ground when I said 'hold the mouse', others would just stare at the keyboard when I said can you find the 7 or the H. So with some of the kids, I helped type the letters so they could play the games like the other kids.

Oh..this was going to be a long 90 minutes. 

There was one little girl, we'll call her Polly. She was different and all the teachers would talk loudly to her. Once we entered the computer lab, the main teacher who had the same tone and volume in her voice as the scary catholic school marms with rulers for weapons, took Polly aside and said loudly 

'Polly! Say m.o.u.s.e.. Can you say that? Look at me Polly say the word!' Polly shrugged her shoulders and glared at the teacher. 

I was glaring too thinking to myself, why would she answer you when you're yelling at her?

The teacher stands up and announces to the aids with Polly listening along with the other kids

'If you're going to help Polly use simple words. Talk slowly and don't try to show her, she won't listen and she's not catching on. Her learning level is very low and they are testing her. In fact, I'll just take care of her and put a movie on. That's the only thing that works with her!'

And with that, my mind was made. Polly was going to be my friend. 

After computer lab we headed outside to play. Polly played in the sandbox and stole the other little girls shovels to make her castle. Never speaking, just humming to herself. I watched. 

What are her parents like? Do they know the teachers talk to her like that? What tests are they doing? When we went inside, I helped with rotations and every 15 minutes the groups switched from each volunteers table. We had a snack and I read a story at my table. 

Polly sat right next to me, I told her she was my helper and needed to help me read the books. She didn't speak words, just grunts and pointed to pictures she liked. She never threw a fit with me and only when the group was told to switch tables, did she show disappointment, I let her just stay with me. She pointed to the black dog as I read all about the color black. Her favorite picture was of the starry night and she'd say oooohhhh and ahhhhhh. I wanted to scoop her up and cuddle her. Find a mirror and tell her how beautiful she is and how smart she is. Don't be discouraged, we are here because we love her and know she can do it. It's OK if you don't learn the same as other kids. Everyone is different. 

I didn't use simple words. I just talked to her like everyone else. Did she understand? I'm not sure. Did she behave? Yes. Did my appreciation for parents of special needs children grow? Immensely. I had so much fun with Jayden's class today. There was a need and I put on my hat. But the bonus was I made a new friend. From now on when I visit Jayden's class...I'll be keeping my eye out for Polly. I have no idea of her past or what the teachers have been through with her. I can only base my opinion on the 90 minutes I spent with her today. 

If you have kids in school...make some time to put on a volunteer hat. The teachers and our children need  your help. 

Thursday, September 22, 2011

Blogger Challenged

In the past, I have considered myself technically savvy. I'm quick to research help buttons or search engines to find what I need, I navigate easily through pages and most products. I'm also usually the one to help my mother with her technical issues with her phone and what I lovingly call her I-Pain in the ass Ü

My blog is no different, I've had assistance with the design two years ago but feel confident that I could update posts, links and so on. I'm comfortable with blogger. Lately, it seems that my posts won't space correctly and I spend less time writing and more time researching or re-posting to get my layout right.

I started to research and everything kept pointing to my web browser. Well, I have no idea about web browsers. I use IE and have no clue if it's 7,8,9 or 10. So my research lead to me to believe that my choice was updating to Google Chrome or Mozilla Fire Fox. I've previewed Chrome before and it is 100% different from IE. I have no clue how to navigate it. So I switched back to IE. Blogger offers a newer version to post and quicker download times. So, for now I'm doing the best of both worlds. Google Chrome for blogging and IE for the rest of mine and Cory's internet usage.

While I'm typing this post the layout is completely different. So, we'll see how it goes! Let me know if anyone who is reading this is web browser savvy and where I can go to find out more information.

For now...I'll be on Blogger Chrome Ü

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Need a reason....

To hold your children close tonight?

Please visit here

Then read his Mother's words...they are truly life altering.

My thoughts and prayers are with the Donaldson Family.

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Moore, ID

Cory has been looking for a dually and found one in Moore, ID. Where you ask? We had no idea either, but we left work early to venture on one of our favorite past times together...Road Trips.
I love road trips with Cory. We've driven a few places before we had kids and haven't had the chance to do much since. So, off we went!

Do you know what lies 50 miles West of I-15 in Idaho? Well..I didn't either so let me share with you what we found.

Once we hit BlackFoot, ID we exited the freeway and headed West. There wasn't much to see for miles, but all of a sudden we came to a intersection and all we could see were HUGE buses. Like Greyhounds. Except they were all painted yellow and said 'Idaho National Laboratories'. I told Cory, do think they are Top Secret employees that have to be driven by bus to the radiation labs??? (This is possible right? Maybe I watch too many movies)

He of course wasn't too sure of that analogy. So we headed on, seeing many signs with the atomic symbol and this 'Idaho Laboratories with buses passing us.

Once we hit Arco, ID there was a little gas station that no one appeared to know where to park. All the cars were lined up against the building and not in parking stalls.

We walked into the gas station and it smelled of strong bacon scents, and why wouldn't you grill up a vat of bacon at 4:30 in the afternoon? Old couples were eating in silence and a mom was reading a news paper while her son was slumped in the booth starring off into space. Probably wondering why he was seeing tracers and blurred vision from the radiation laboratory.

Maybe his Dad was on that bus.
After a restroom trip and some snacks, we had extra time so I walked around the gas station...and this is what I saw.

I mortified my husband and while Farmer Jack was having bacon bits for dinner I posed next to his John Deere and asked Cory 'Do you think my tractor's SeXy??'

Here's another gem I found, do you really think they sweep the streets of Arco, C'mon...85% of them are dirt!

Isn't this the coolest coke can you've ever seen...16 ounces!!

Across the street, the mountain had numbers painted all over it. I was sure it was the number of people impacted by radiation over the years ~ I instantly thought of Erin Brockovich.
When I was done humiliating my husband, we headed out for Moore, ID. Once we got there, it was a young couple with two small kids. They had a adorable farm house and a nice yard lined with huge pine trees.

As we headed down the little drive, I saw them. I knew that I could easily entertain myself here while Cory worked the truck sell.

Meet Mama and Homer. Oh how I love horses. I headed straight over and I think while I was on a beeline for the horses, I turned my head to mumble

'May I look at your horses?'

I'm sure the wife was thinking 'Um, sure since you're already half way over the fence wierdo.'


Some things I have no restraint on. Clothes, jewelry and horses. I spent the next 45 minutes, petting the horses, talking to them, feeding them apples and taking their pictures. Secretly I reliving my dream of being a barrel racer.

The couples little girl was about 3 and she spent the time with me telling me about her horses. When one would fart she'd say 'That's the horsey's BUTT, it talked to you.'

Here was the keeper...Bells.

Isn't she gorgeous?! 7 months old and believe me ~ I plotted ways to get her in the truck. But the little 3 yr old blondie was having no part of it. 'MY BELLS!!' she kept saying over and over. Alright already, I heard you the first time!

Can't say that I blame that little girl, Little Bells the horse was a sweet heart. Cory made his deals and we headed home. I bid farewell to the horses, day dreaming all the way home about the day I can have my buckskin and ride just once in a rodeo barrel race. We had a great time and made it home about 10 that night.

I did find out from the wife that it IS a radiation plant and nearly everyone works there. If you're not a full time farmer you work at the 'site'. We talked about the buses, apprently the inside scoop is the bosses at 'the site' hate the buses because they're always late and always leave early.
The numbers on the mountain? The graduating classes over the years paint their year on the mountain. (Likely story) The unfortunate part was we came home to Jayden with a fever of 101...yes it was a pleasant weekend!

Monday, September 19, 2011

Sister Mondays....

Is this me and my sisters? NO. The brats wouldn't let me take their pictures. Next time I think I'll have them sign a waiver that if we are to go on any sister dates, I get to take photographs. So, insert random 3 girls here.

A few weeks ago I was talking to Lisa on our daily morning chats. I normally call her once I'm in my car and we chat while I drive to work and she gets the kids ready for school.

I'm not sure why I pick the busiest part of her day to call...other than I'm her baby sister and supposed to bug her for the rest of her life.

On this specific morning we were talking about how this fall is busy for her husband J. He's got bowling on Tuesdays and softball on Thursdays. (I could have mixed those up) But, you get my drift. This leaves her with 4 kids to do errands, hip hop, dinner and bath time.

So I say to her, why don't you pick a night and do something for you? She's not the kind to take a class or join a group of some kind. But she could at least spend 3-4 hours AWAY from the house. She tells me that's not a bad idea and she'll think about it. One question, would I join her? Well..I think to myself..why not? I love spending time with my sister(s) and even if we do twice a month it shouldn't hurt.

We decide niether of us have a lot of cash to be spending on the activities but what we do decide is it will be worth it and fun. We laughed that we could go hang out in a parking lot somewhere and just sit in silence...that would be a welcome break.

I tell Cory about it and he seems ok. You know when your husband tells you it's ok but you know he's not really excited to have you gone? He does Karate two nights a week but he does that with Jayden so that doesn't really count. So we plan for the next Monday to do one of our favorite past times...a drive up the canyon over trappers loop and ice cream at the Oaks. Laurie decides she's on board for some sister time.

It was a pretty drive up the canyon and the Oaks was a bit cooler than we had planned. We decided on a healthy choice of nachos and onion rings and listened to the river. When we were walking down I was sure it was Richard Dreyfuss sitting there to which Lisa and Laurie got hysterical. I told them to scoot together and I would take their picture so I could get in the background. But would they? NO.
We had a great night full of laughter. We may not always see eye to eye on family, kids, spouses, school or religion. But when we get together, we do agree on how hysterical everything is.

I LOVE my sisters. I love that we can talk about everything from the last thing our kids have done to drive us insane and then the next thing you know, we're discussing our sex lives.

No matter what happens to me, the choices I make or what is ahead in my next 30 years I know that I will always have my sisters by my side.

'Sisters by birth, friends by choice.'

Sunday, September 4, 2011

He's just all grown up now... happened. Jayden's in full blown school. Well...1/2 day kindergarten :) His teacher is Ms. Brewer and he's loving it so far. Here are some pictures of that day.

Jayden, Ally and Snacks..(Casey)

OMG...he melts my heart.

Cheese'N it!

His smile face while thinking inside 'Let me get on the damn bus Mom!'

And..this is my baby, my first, my life, driving away on a BUS. It's like tomorrow will be High School graduation, College, Marriage, Babies. I'm so proud of myself..I didn't follow the bus!

Jayden, you are the smartest little 5 yr old I know. You have a smile that melts everyone's heart and you are so brave. Make many friends, be yourself and be proud of who you are. There are no limits to what you can do...we BELIEVE in you ♥

Friday, September 2, 2011

Race Way

AFCU had it's employee party at the Rocky Mountain Raceway this year. We took Harry with us and had a great night. The boys loved watching the cars, I was a little bummed...we gave our raffle tickets away to leave to get Casey and 5 minutes after we left they won a freakin flat screen TV and lunch coupons!! Oh well.. I guess that's my luck. It was a fun date night with my parents, Jade and Cory!

Tired already!! This is on the way TO the races!

Pa Harley and Harry

Ma Jo & Jayden

I LOVE this picture...I know this sounds retarded and degrading but it reminds me of the movie Forrest Gump when he's sitting on the log at the end with his son! LOL..are you laughing out loud?! Because I am! Love you Daddy ♥

Thursday, September 1, 2011

St. George

A couple of weeks ago (I know, past due..but hey not too many of you were willing to share the comment love in my previous making you wait was the punishment!)

Anyway, I digress.

We have family down there that we miss so so so much, when I was able to get a Saturday off we decided to make full use of it. They are the kind of family that we can go years without seeing each other and just pick up where we left off. I feel so welcome and loved, it's hard to live so far away. :(

The drive was a bit long, but we made it there safely. My gracious Aunt let us use her timeshare at the WorldMark resorts and it was fabulous! We had a two bedroom condo, with two pool areas including a kidde pool perfect for Casey.

We spent time at the pool, had a BBQ with just the four of us and had fun with late night pillow fights and watching movies. Mostly, just being lazy and getting prepared for the busy life of school days.

We also had a great night with a Pizza party at the Green's. It was so fun to see the kids all together and visit with the girls. Words can't describe how much we love Bob and Anne...they are truly special people.

Cory's Grandma Gen with the great grandkids
Brian showing Jayden the unicycle. That child was on every kind of bike, scooter, razor you could imagine all night long. He LOVED it!

Look at this Chub-a-lub! Cory looks so handsome with that little babe ;) I also took my turn mushing all over his cheeks..he's too little to run away!

And the pogostick..pretty sure I had at least 3 strokes while watching this.

Our gourmet chef at the Condo

Nothing like a late dinner, in pajama's while watching Rio on vacation!

Loving family pool time!

Look at these handsome doesn't get much better.

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